• Profile picture of Hynes

    Hynes posted an update in the group Group logo of CommunityCommunity 1 years, 7 months ago

    Iam new here and I have a great weakness for scratch tickets as long as I don’t have money in my pocket I seem to be ok but my wife gave me 200 to last me for the weekend because she is flying out of province to visit grand kids .So I bought beer , rum for a barbecue with some male friends also of course I spent 60 bucks on scratch tickets and the crazy thing is I said I wouldn’t and the urge was more stronger and I bought 6 .10 dollar crossword and won 10 buck and the whole time iam scratching and not getting the letters I need the words out if my mouth r fucking Jesus h Christ and after I decide that I quit for the day shame creeps in for the cursing someone please help me iam afraid one of these days iam gonna shoot myself
    ,

    • Profile picture of Seeking.freedom
      Seeking.freedom replied 1 years, 7 months ago

      I’ll be honest, I’m new here and have felt the same way. I know I am not okay and that I am trying to be better everyday. But giving up without trying your hardest to solve the issue (for me) was unfair to those I care about. People may not understand your struggle but if they truly love you and care about you, they will always be there. I feel I owe those people my hardest to be better. To try harder. To stay positive and force positive affirmations down my throat. Things do get better. But finding alternatives or changing day to day habits. Get out of your comfort zone. It’s what’s helping me currently, and reading what others struggle through. I relate constantly and I think checking these boards and reading them remind me of my pain and struggle and how I refuse to feel again. Stay here, keep this site in your phone.

    • Profile picture of kenl
      kenl replied 1 years, 7 months ago

      Well said Seekingfreedom
      Took me years of trying to stop on my own and I nearly lost everything including my life but I finally sought out a GA meeting and counseling. And with the support of others just like me I celebrated 20 years of One Day At A Time of not gambling.
      Hope you think about attending a GA group and please keep visiting here and post your thoughts feelings nd progress
      And if you have any questions or just need to share feel free to email me at ken.lambon@rogers.com
      And if you are around at 11 pm I tried to visit chatroom each day.
      Take Care
      Ken L Grateful Recovering CG