• Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 5 months ago

    I was in somewhat of a similar boat. I owe back student loans and that loomed over my head for years. I played and always told myself “if I won big, that’s was it, I’m paying all my debt off and gonna live happily ever after” unfortunately life isn’t a fairy tale, but you can live happily. The problem is not your will, it’s that at some point…[Read more]

    • Thank you. I believe you and I am going to work on it. The hardest part is I see people win big and you always hope. But hopefully taking your recommendations will steer me in the right direction.

      • Hi Joyce
        Glad you are reaching out for support
        My experience has been that there is never a big enough win for a compulsive gambler.
        The Dream World of the Compulsive Gambler describes that.

        What is the dream world of the compulsive gambler?
        This is another common characteristic of compulsive gamblers. A lot of time is spent creating images of…[Read more]

    • Hi. I had to face the truth. No win will ever be enough for me. And I’ll never win enough to pay back what I’ve lost. It was time to put the shovel down and crawl out of the hole I kept digging. No more bets. Facing my reality. And making amends. However I could even if it meant I couldn’t do what I wanted to make it right. Hope you share here…[Read more]

  • Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 5 months ago

    Keep yourself accountable. Stay strong. Talk about it. Be here and read everyone else’s stories too. It has helped me a lot. I couldn’t go more than 3 days at the most before rummaging up some money to go play. Tomorrow will be 3 weeks of not gambling. It’s been weird to beable to go do things again and not stress as much. I think everyone is he…[Read more]

  • Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 5 months ago

    Did the same as sec. Hold yourself accountable for your actions. It feels embarrassing and scary. But if you let yourself be vulnerable it maybe freeing to let go of that pressure. I def get urges but know the repercussions and finding better ways to spend my time and money. I wish you the best and hope you stay here, it helps me a lot to read…[Read more]

  • Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 5 months ago

    Well spoken, the task is daunting, I am still new to this quitting as well. I’m 12 days down and 28 days free from alcohol. I almost relapsed this weekend when I saw family and they were all drinking. I started to think “one drink is okay and I can stop by the bar and put in $20 and enjoy myself”… my family said “no, he’s not drinking or gambling…[Read more]

  • Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 5 months ago

    Also. Be strong, and stay accountable. Things are hard

  • Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 5 months ago

    It’s crazy because your mind doesn’t care about the winnings. Your thoughts feel like it’s about the winnings, but it’s your mind telling you that it feels good to anticipate and predict. Every time you do it, it sends signals that tell you to keep going. https://youtu.be/BF5SzIN63w8
    Try watching this. It helped me understand why I kept going b…[Read more]

  • Seeking.freedom posted an update in the group Group logo of CommunityCommunity 1 year, 5 months ago

    Yesterday I held myself accountable to those I care about and the ones I’ve hid my addiction of gambling from. I felt extremely vulnerable to put myself out there and explain to my friends and family what I’ve been doing for some time. The initial question from almost all of them was “why?” But talking to them explaining what was happening to me a…[Read more]

    • Well done Seeking
      I know when I came clean with my family it was the beginning of my recovery and I apricated their love and support.
      And in recovery rooms they say We are only as sick as our secrets so the sooner we get rid of them the sooner we can
      start to recover and develop a better way of living and thinking.

  • Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 6 months ago

    Find a gamblers anonymous meeting in your local area. Read through this message board. Strive to stay diligent on making different choices. Realize it’s not easy and it’s not going to be easy, but just like anything else that’s hard to do, it’s rewarding.

  • Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 6 months ago

    *win not sun

  • Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 6 months ago

    I’ve done the same thing numerous times. It’s gut wrenching, I’ve beaten myself up, I’ve thought the only way to quit was to end my life because I couldn’t control myself. What I can say is, focus on the problem. Don’t ignore it. Be honest with yourself. And work constantly on how to make things better. It’s hard. But life isn’t easy. I believe…[Read more]

  • Seeking.freedom posted an update in the group Group logo of CommunityCommunity 1 year, 6 months ago

    I made it through the weekend. I had multiple urges to stop at the local bar (they have video lottery at every bar and on every corner in my state) near my home at night. I realized I would get bored at night and not want to go home. But I am past the weekend coming up on a week. And have been reading these boards every day and every time I feel…[Read more]

    • Congrats Seeking.freedom!! That’s awesome. Any day that ends without making a bet is a victory. Welcome to freedom.😊 xo

    • I love playing video games. I can relax after a day’s work only this way. I want to immerse myself in the game and enjoy the magical world. So thank you very much for the game play snake you recommended.

  • Seeking.freedom posted a new activity comment 1 year, 6 months ago

    I’ll be honest, I’m new here and have felt the same way. I know I am not okay and that I am trying to be better everyday. But giving up without trying your hardest to solve the issue (for me) was unfair to those I care about. People may not understand your struggle but if they truly love you and care about you, they will always be there. I fee…[Read more]

  • Seeking.freedom posted an update in the group Group logo of CommunityCommunity 1 year, 6 months ago

    This is my first time reaching out. I have talked to family that deals with the same situations. I find myself explaining to myself how to be better, goals to not run back to gambling and it works, for a bout a week. But I’m tired of being stressed and drained and feeling chained to habits that I feel I can’t shake. I have “nightmares” and “day te…[Read more]

    • Hi Seeking .Freedom.

      You are not alone in the need for finding strength too stay away from gambling. It’s been awhile since I really thought about what really helped with stopping gambling. It can be frightening, and physiologically challenging too a degree. It’s part of your name. Freedom, freedom from the pull. Self exclusion and where eve…[Read more]

      • psychologically Challenging.

      • I’m glad you quit and are starting a new life. Come here and go on recovery chat. You got this. Keep reminding yourself that you made an adult decision to quit gambling and pat yourself on the back. You made the right decision to get off that roller coaster.