• JerMe posted an update in the group Group logo of CommunityCommunity 1 years, 4 months ago

    Hello all – thanks for responding to my previous post. Feeling a lot of shame this morning. Back at work and feeling like the entire world knows I’m a problem gambler. The slightest gesture from anyone gives me anxiety that they know about me – that I’m irresponsible, that I will lose my job. I feel paranoid but also justified in feeling so anxious. I have no evidence that anyone knows. When asked how my weekend was, I have to pretend that it was great. Sort of show that nothing is wrong, that I don’t have a problem. I’m tired of this game I’ve created. Rather than be at work, I simply want to crawl in a closet and hide – as if that would make it all go away. But I’d feel safe for that short while.

    No bets today.

    • Jerome, shame is such an awful part of it. Shame, guilt, being anxious, feeling worthless. Just remember that you are a good person and every time those thoughts come say to yourself that you are worth something. Know none of this is easy but we just keep trying, don’t give up!