• debrabluhm posted an update in the group Group logo of CommunityCommunity 3 weeks ago

    Hi. My problem is buying scratch off tickets. I used to buy 2.00 ones now 20 or 30 dollar ones I got paid monthly taking care of my mom. So when I got stressed or boarded I would go buy..I paid my bills and got enough diapers but was broke by the middle of the month My husband keep his money desperate from me and we just split the bills. He hates gambling and always brings up my problem .yes I admit it and I now don’t have my mom or income. I have not been buying. But my car is broke I am going to be working with my husband midnights at his plant.. I don’t trust myself and I am emotional.even slit my wrist so had to make up story as to why I could not start job today .hope I heal by next Monday…this is horrible and I have been married 3 other times had bad car wreck broke femur crushed ankle. Raised two boys dead beat Dad .married gay guy. Went thru My son in Iraq for 8 months and he would call me and tell me everything.stuff you don’t tell your mom. I felt responsible because I pushed him to go in Navy. To become a man.. My family was in Navy. He came home.. Anyway I have been thru he’ll and now things are good .but I am addicted to SCRATCH OFFS WHY..I AM ANGRY AT MYSELF…

    • Debra I hear you. You have had experiences that have changed your cognition. I know you can start that job, and I know you can never buy another scratch off ticket. You have to be vigilant about not gambling and change your negative thoughts. People here recommend GA. They aren’t wrong! It makes you accountable to others to attend GA meetings. I am chatting on here only. Please don’t hurt yourself and I hope your day is good today Debra!