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It has been over 1 year since I have gambled. By God’s grace have I been able to escape. I do not miss it as such. However, I think about my trips to the casino, the drive, the thrill, the hope , the music in the car, the feeling of being away and alone, just thrilled me. The first bet filled with hope, just me and slot machines and no other care. It still gives me a thrill. I let it go thru me all the way to the end and the utter despair of leaving with thoughts of anger, depression, sadness, self-hatred and so on. If anything I learned how much beating I can take, whether it is self inflicted or caused by other things. God has carried me. May I never forget. He truly has pulled me out and given me joy. I think with regret of my losses less often and knowing how God loved me will sustain me as long as I stay close.
Just wanted to share ❤
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My thoughts exactly thanks for the reminder of the whole truth of this addiction!
God is a very important part of recovery I would wish more would just try to get closer to him, nobody is saying you have to go to church or tell everyone praise the lord, just get closer to him, give him a chance let him be in your thoughts that is all he is asking and he will help you in all your needs not just gambling.